Cheesy DCfW New Year’s Big11 Fan Expectations for 2007

It's that time of year when you make those hollow resolutions that you wont eat like you have a feedbag strapped to your face...or your visits with Vietnamese prostitutes will lessen in frequency below your visits to Airport Spas.

At the DCfW, instead of resolutions...we like to set some expecations for the 2007 season (Yeah, I know...2006 season isnt really over yet, but bear with me here.)

So let us run through 2007 Football Festivus Expectations for the BigTeleven...


Not to fall into the trap of believing that Zook’s recruiting prowess will equate to wins (Ask these guys any queries you may have….EDSBS)

Not to allow visiting fans to take over stadium, since schools like OSU and UM seem to treat this as a pseudo home game every other year. Enjoy Lewis, Fisher, and Hardy. They will be will be a fantastic combo next season.

Prepare for letdown of losing coach to the Steelers…and get ready for a return to the days of pre-Banks/Tate Iowa. Well, it seems like you guys had some practice this year.

Not to get to overzealous about Ron English, as he will actually have to “coach up” his players in 2007. However, the offense should be “fant-abulous.”

Prepare to have a team that doesn’t implode at game six (or sooner) on the schedule each year. A pre-emptive welcome back to consistent Big10 competitiveness from the rest of us.

New Quarterback…Running game in shambles…There is always hockey..and when is that stadium construction starting?

Bacher and Sutton will be efficient next year…and the defense will most likely be efficiently bad.

Welcome to the world of platooning QBs…crap….

Welcome to the world of platooning QBs….yay….

QB will throw for 50,000 yards…defense will give up 50,001 yards

Hello 3 yards and a Cloud of Dust…and House of Pain…